Back in the Jug Agane by Geoffrey Willans & Ronald Searle

Author:Geoffrey Willans & Ronald Searle
Language: eng
Format: epub
ISBN: 9780141932637
Publisher: Penguin Books Ltd
Published: 2009-09-14T04:00:00+00:00

He hav climbed on the conveyor belt and an absent-minded workman is bolting him on instead of a mudguard.

Now to the TRAKTOR skool. Wot do we see? Wizard combine harvesters, traktors, sub-soilers, ploughs and fork-lifters. Everything for the young farmer in fakt. Agane my notebook come out.

‘Why do you hav a skool for traktors?’ i grit.

‘A splendid wizard q.!’ exclame the guide. He turn to GRIMES. ‘Wot a brany, inteligent, outstanding pupil.’

‘er… Yes,’ sa GRIMES, (thinks: i hav always said molesworth would turn out well. A late-developer.)

‘We hav a skool for traktors,’ sa the guide, ‘becos it is no use for a farmer having a traktor unless he kno how to use it and how to keep it in good repare. So we trane people from all over the world how to plow, ridge, avoid soil erosion and other worthy things. The result is more of everything -wheat, beet, turnips, cabage—’

CABAGE! At the mention of the word the whole skool think of cabage and give a groan. More skool CABAGE! And full of beetles and slugs even molesworth 2 will not eat slugs.

‘CABAGE?’ sa molesworth I, the ace reporter. ‘i supose we shall get more spinach as well?’

‘Yes, yes.’

At the very thort the skool groan agane. Wot is the use of traktors if they get more CABAGE and spinach, eh? We shall get more skool sossages next. Our guide see that he hav made a bish. ‘Who would like to drive a traktor now? Our traktor can be driven by a child of eight.’

A mighty cheer rend the air.

‘Goody goody,’ sa fotherington-tomas, jumping up and down. ‘Hullo clouds, hullo sky here i come, trusty and true, a joly farmer who plow the good rich earth, who, simple soul that he be…’

WAM! 91 boyish hands are raised aganst him, but it is too late.

‘You look a sturdy little chap,’ sa the guide to fotherington-tomas. ‘You shall drive the traktor and now i want a volunteer from the masters to ride behind.’ There is silence, ‘How about you sir?’ sa the guide to GRIMES.

‘Me? Wot me?’

‘Anybody else?’

With a cry like a hyena sigismund the mad maths master spring upon the traktor and stand behind the saddle with straws in his sparse hare, fotherington-tomas grasp the steering wheel zoom the throttle and away they go cheers cheers cheers cheers. ARUM ARA ARUM mud fly in all directions and fotherington-tomas dash into a shed. Will he make it? Out the other end, turn left, zoom through a hay stack then round in a circle.

‘Stop him stop him,’ yell the guide.

fotherington-tomas turn three more circles and make for the open country, then reverse back scattering all, heading for the mane road. Wot will his fate be? But he hit another haystack and stop chiz chiz chiz just when it was getting interesting.

‘Most stimulating,’ sa sigismund the mad maths master.

‘Goody goody,’ sa fotherington-tomas. ‘May I drive a combine now?’

Well you kno a combine it is a mighty thing which harvest the corn and put it into sacks you can imagine wot would hapenwe should all be harvested and put into sacks too.

Download

Copyright Disclaimer:
This site does not store any files on its server. We only index and link to content provided by other sites. Please contact the content providers to delete copyright contents if any and email us, we'll remove relevant links or contents immediately.